Kid Rock Loves Krutons!

So I met Kid Rock at a salad bar in Kingsport, Tennessee yesterday. For reals.

I think I'll file that one away under the "most surreal sentences I've ever typed" category.

Here's what happened. My friend Craig and I were heading down to Kingsport to cover the Food City Family Race nights event for work (Food City is one of our clients). Basically, it's a chance for NASCAR fans to meet and greet some of their favorite drivers. We go down and interview people in the crowd. I know next to nothing about NASCAR, but for some reason I'm the "on air interviewer." Hilarity usually ensues, at my expense.

Anyways, we got to the event about an hour before the show started. We hadn't had lunch, so we headed down to the convention center's restaurant. There was literally no one in there. Or so I thought.

Our waitress tells us we can order from the menu, or check out the salad bar. I go to do that. Once I'm up there, I look to my left and standing next to me is Kid Rock. Mr. "Baw-wit-tha-Baw." Mr. "I've been married to Pamela Anderson and punched out Tommy Lee."

He was putting krutons on his salad and went with ranch instead of raspberry vinagerette.

Like I said surreal.

So I go back to the table and tell Craig that, um, I think that's Kid Rock. He goes up and confirms that, um, yes it is. We have our video camera and immediately start planning how we can get him to "give us a shout out" for our little program we're filming. We also begin texting and calling our friends to tell them how cool we are.

I think it's important to note here, that I'm not even a fan of Kid Rock or his music. So I'm not sure why I was getting so caught up. But I was.

We hang out as long as we can, but Kid never comes back for seconds at the salad bar. (Don't Rock Stars like to eat?) So we go out to the convention floor to start our interviews. We're bummed that we couldn't get him on camera, But then...

About 10 minutes later we learn that the Kid and his crew are sitting outside in a private courtyard! Then things started to get real Spinal Tappy. We approach his Kid-ness, with our camera in hand, asking him if we could get him to say a few things. He's sitting in a rocking chair, smoking a cigar with a toboggin on his head. (How could I make this stuff up?) He never really acknowledges our question: instead he squints at the sun and says, to no one in particular, "I can't see anything without my glasses."

I immediately think of Velma from Scooby Doo.

His manager, a 300+ pound Samoian (again, I COULD NOT make this stuff up) appears out of nowhere and places Kid's glasses on his face. Kid has not moved from his rocking chair, and continues smoking his cigar. He also continues not to acknowledge that we're there. But then...

Another girl helping us with the event remembers that Kid is a big Dale Jerrett fan. Dale is retiring from racing this year, and was being honored in a special ceremony at the event later that afternoon. Kid's eyes (behind his shades) light up, and he agrees to let us film him giving props to his boy Dale. Good enough for us.

Kid's manager (the 300+ pound Samoian) then waddles over to Craig and I, and says, in a voice deeper than Barry White's:

Don't nobody turn on that camera until I get Mr. Rock's hat.

Um. Yes sir.

As we are waiting with Kid and his crew on the manager to retrieve "Mr. Rock's" hat from who knows where, several thoughts ran through my mind:

1) A Rock Star manager's job is never done. Already I've witnessed this guy put on Kid Rock's glasses for him. Now he's retrieving his hat. It's like being the mother to a 5 year old.

2) The corralation between vampires and rock stars is a good one. Kid and everyone in his band are all pasty white and look as if being out in the sun pains them. Kid is still wearing a toboggain in 70 degree weather. They all look unhealthy and like they could use a hug.

3) Despite the fact that I don't really like his music, I realize that I am in the middle of a story that I will throw out at dinner parties for years to come.

So Kid's manager returns, and like the sunglasses, puts the hat on his head for him. Seriously. Kid has not moved an inch from his rocking chair the whole time. He perks up a bit, and asks us what we want him to say. He gives a plug to Dale Jerrett, which we play for Dale and a crowd of NASCAR fans later in the evening.

The crowd roared in approval. Dale Jerrett himself said from the stage "That's awesomel...I need a copy of that so my kids will think I'm cool." And to think, it all started at the salad bar.

We're editing a video together of all the fun. I'll post a link once we have it on the YouTubes.

Rock on!